Why Sonic? Well, if you were ~12 years old in 1999, three things happened:

1. Sonic Adventure came out in North America
2. Home Internet access exploded
3. You started feeling funny feelings down there

And that’s what Sonicmas is all about, Charlie Brown.

“You have much pain… share it with me.”

“I teleported home one night, With Ron and Sid and Meg. Ron stole Meggie’s heart away, And I got Sidney’s leg.” - The Teleportation Blues

“You encounter a grandma. Roll for gelt.”

Tonight we dice in hell.

Nice! I’m going to have a look at my old HS yearbook and see who’s opposite page…

“Future Farmers of America”

“It’s the little room in the front of the plane where the pilots sit, but that’s not important right now.”

I’m interested enough in this game to pick it up when it comes out, but I have to admit that I didn’t finish the first one. I liked it well enough, but my interest in it just petered out over time, and at some point, I just never came back to it. I hope that “i” will be a little more compelling. Either that, or I hope my attention span has increased over the last ten years!

Hold my 401k, I’m goin’ in!

“You want me to play a robot? But I want to show off my acting range!”

“Don’t worry, you’ll also get to play two other robots and a couple of old guys!”

Well, my parents were worshipers of Ishtar, so I was kind of born into it…

“What is… a ‘Puppy Bowl?’”

It’s there for me. I wish I could help :(

Is an ass-wagon something you’d use to haul ass?

“If you think that is bad, you should see what he did to my brothers. Why are you laughing, that was a genuine request.”

Months later…

Tuvok: “Captain, I must object…”

Janeway: “Ugh, I should have left you in Tuvix.”

Tuvok: “… I beg your pardon?”

You want a tail, play a Kobold!

What a relief, I’d hate to think those files ended up in the wrong paws hands.

Tuvix learned too late that giving speeches doesn’t solve anything (unless you’re a captain).

“And don’t trust clothing extruded from weird alien technology.”