miz_elektro

Not a personal website, but I’m currently working on my portfolio site for when it’s time to find a job. I’m in school for software development. I’ve made websites using Wordpress templates and very basic html/css long before but now I’m actually trying to code mine from scratch with html/css/js now that I’ve learned enough in school. It is really fun, especially when you find cool tricks and they work!

Just got the news last week that my dad, who was diagnosed with Pancreatic cancer in October, might have 5-7 months left. Plus my mom is slowly dying from COPD. I’m trying to stay positive and spend what might be the last Christmas we get with them. But to say I’m not feeling the happy new year vibes is an understatement. Only death and more depression coming in 2024.

A horror movie called It’s Alive. I was 5 years old. My mom would rent horror movies without checking the ratings and I’d watch them. Even after this I always loved horror and never had nightmares or anything. But, I rewatched It’s Alive a few years ago and it is definitely not for kids… But honestly the craziest thing my mom rented was The Toxic Avenger, when I was maybe 10. She never saw it herself it so still has no idea what she allowed me to watch at a young age!

I found out the difference between just normal dislike and phobias a few years ago. I dislike insects and they make me jumpy but I wasn’t terrified of any of them, even spiders. Until I had an encounter with giant carpenter ants, both the normal ones and the ones with wings.

I was living in my RV and apparently it was their nesting season, and I come from a different province and normally never see large ants like these. I kept finding them everywhere in my trailer, these giant ants, like I’d open a drawer and pull out a dish cloth and one would be underneath it. I was crying hysterically and shaking and I would rather have died than come across another one. It went on for about 3 days, I barely slept because the fuckers were crawling all over the ceiling and walls at night.

I went and picked up ant killer spray and went scorched earth on them. Within a day there were dozens of dead ones inside the trailer and probably thousands outside in the gravel. It was crazy. Neighbouring campers had these ants too, I guess it was normal nesting season there and no one worried about it much. They started to comment that the ants were disappearing earlier. I didn’t tell them it was me lol. But yeah, I have a phobia I wasn’t expecting and I lose my shit when I see them to this day.

I’m very sure I’ll be able to contribute to this conversation at the end of the semester. I have an Organizational Behavior class and the teacher is a prick, narcissist and a bully. Treating us adults like we are misbehaving children and gaslighting us every class.

It’s interesting how it affects people differently. When I lost my sense of smell with COVID, bad smells were the last to return. I could smell everything else but couldn’t smell bathroom smells, eggs, skunk, or weed (debatable if the last one is bad or not, but either way it was gone). It was nice, I was hoping to only smell nice things forever, but it came back.

Cold Pursuit

I saw it in theatres and I remember people weren’t laughing and some were walking out because they were bored. I can guarantee that all of them saw Liam Neeson was the lead and were expecting another action packed Taken type movie. What we got instead was a movie reminiscent of Fargo or The Big Lebowski. It’s absolutely hilarious, I’ve watched it many times and I’ve shown friends this one and they’ve all loved it. Highly recommend!

Just deleted my Twitter account. Of course, the app gave nothing but errors so I had to do it on desktop, but it’s done!

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It really does hurt! I never even considered it might be pressure, mostly because I wasn’t feeling any sinus issues at the time. At least you were able to think rationally lol.

I could definitely see it with any kind of elevation change, that sounds horrible!

That sounds terrifying!

It was so scary that first time, I also had no idea and I just wanted to start screaming but I could only imagine the chaos that would have caused! I’ve had a couple times since where I feel a bit of pressure but I do the same as you with holding my nose and mouth and blow and it seems to help along with the Sudafed. Crazy hearing someone else had this too!

One time I took a solo 1.5 hour flight and on the descent I suddenly felt a tingling on the top of my head and down my face, which quickly turned into a feeling like someone chopped an axe into the top of my head. I felt an excruciating pain on the top center of my head , behind my eyes and down my face and was trying not to react in front of all the other passengers. The pain was unlike anything I’ve ever experienced. By the time we landed and I got off the plane the sharpness of the pain subsided but I had a bad headache for 2 days after. I thought I might die honestly and it spun me into such a bad anxiety attack. I did some searching and only found one post ever of something similar happening to someone else and it was from sinus pressure. I wasn’t sick at all or stuffed up so it was surprising. So now when I fly I pop Sudafed and blow my nose frequently and basically have a panic attack on the descent because of my fear of it happening again.

I do this all the time too, and one day I decided just to look it up and we what it’s called. Rumination. Honestly for me, just reading about it, finding out that it’s super common, and giving it a name helped to stop it. When I find myself thinking about embarrassing things I did years ago or replaying and over analyzing things I just think “oh I’m ruminating again” and it usually goes away for a while. That along with other distraction techniques can help.

https://www.mind-diagnostics.org/blog/repetitive-thoughts-and-behaviors/what-is-rumination

I do this all the time too, and one day I decided just to look it up and we what it’s called. Rumination. Honestly for me, just reading about it, finding out that it’s super common, and giving it a name helped. When I find myself thinking about embarrassing things I did years ago or replaying things I just think “oh I’m ruminating again” and it usually goes away for a while.

https://www.mind-diagnostics.org/blog/repetitive-thoughts-and-behaviors/what-is-rumination