I wonder if Bobby Jerkyskin doling out measles like demonic Oprah will improve these stats 🤔

Bradbury did it

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Small_Assassin_(short_story)

pdf here

“It’s not nice being afraid of the thing you birthed.” Her whisper lowered, became harsh, fierce, swift. “He tried to kill me! He lies there, listens to us talking, waiting for you to go away so he can try to kill me again! I swear it!” Sobs broke from her.
“Please,” he kept saying, soothing her. “Stop it, stop it. Please.”
She cried in the dark for a long time. Very late she relaxed, shakingly, against him. Her breathing came soft, warm, regular, her body twitched its worn reflexes and she slept.
He drowsed.
And just before his eyes lidded wearily down, sinking him into deeper and yet deeper tides, he heard a strange little sound of awareness and awakeness in the room.
The sound of small, moist, pinkly elastic lips.
The baby.

This one dad wrote an article about introducing his kid to retro gaming, starting with the old Atari console and progressing through newer generations every few months.

https://medium.com/message/playing-with-my-son-e5226ff0a7c3

(some of the image links are broken on the original article so here’s an archive link)

Every congress session should open with someone holding up a giant posterboard labeled “Number of Child Rapes” and below it have GOP politician on the left and drag queens on the right, with a big fat 0 under the drag queen section.

Also that you can’t single tap to close pictures if they’re zoomed

I think Punch Drunk Love was his best serious role, but I also remember liking Reign Over Me and Spanglish. His more recent Uncut Gems was pretty good too.

It’s a huge fucking country. The same wisdom of not getting involved in a land war in Asia applies.

at least the nazis are dumb

Is this some kind of shell pattern clams have?

Did that at summer camp as a kid, but memories are distant so it’s hard to compare. Prob similar, I vaguely remember sweating like crazy

What does that have to do with watching tiktok? Seems like a regular boomer-ass comment to me.

You think the genital police can tell the difference between an adult and a child?

Where does the article say she didn’t vote, or that she was even 18 ten months ago?

Just never been in that kind of heat before. It was oppressively hot, breathing felt heavy, and sweat was pouring out like a dripping faucet. Interesting sensations

I was in one the other day that was 118. My first time being in one so hot, and it was… surprising.

some of Trump’s kids and test the waters there, but they’re inconveniently too old and too young or too female

I don’t think Cokey or Dumbo have a problem with being too old or young, but they’re somehow amazingly even dumber than daddy shitpants and have the charisma of a hammer and a soggy noodle respectively.

Except when q really focuses its mind and can support itself solely on its inner qi.

There are plenty of rules, it’s just that half of the elected officials are traitors. He should’ve been ousted with the first impeachment but half of the country yearns for fascism, or at least they think they do until the boot is on their neck. I can only hope I live long enough to see Rafael Cruz struggling to breathe with a boot down his throat, wondering if he’d have escaped it if only he’d licked it harder.

Too late , Musky. Tim Apple laid the gold tribute at the feet of the orange idol, so now he gets to do whatever he wants.

[adjective] as

Kiwi phrase detected ;)