mood

Suggest?

So I did the math. A 30 year fixed and a 50 year fixed have a monthly payment difference of $1.

What the absolute fuck.

Yay! I love to see it. I briefly looked into it this summer but then I got distracted and lost track

I think he’s kidding.

I hope.

God fuck this timeline, I can’t tell either now.

But at the same time, it’s the superpower. Prescience.

A myriad of possibilities. Actions. Their consequences. From your point forward. Every action you take. Sometime it happens exactly as you’ve seen it. Sometimes you’re able to see the different outcome for which you need to take a different actions. The fear. The anxiety.

What use is it to know the future, if you also have to take action in the moment?

The mantra comes into place, here. At this moment.

I must not fear.

Fear is the mind killer.

Fear is the little death that brings total obliteration.

Instead I will face my fear.

I will permitt it to wash over me and through me.

And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye and see along its path.

And there will be nothing.

Only I will remain.

Stuffed inside of a bag he put himself in.

I mean those are probably better ways to incite a civil war than by provoking protestors.

But what do I know

That’s actually a great point that I did overlook.

They would.

They seriously would. Authoritarianism is a pathology. Change my mind.

Of course. It all makes perfect sense.

You know, this really has me pondering my projects architecture. We have tiers of services.

At the top, we have the UI. Then we have a “consumer” an “orchestra” and a “data” tier.

Data is the tier that exclusively talks to databases. Orchestra talks to the multiple data services. A good chunk of business logic is here. Consumer uses the orchestra and handles UI requests.

All it essentially does is split the monolith into 3 services at minimum. And since it’s on the cloud, there’s a start up cost where we need to spin up 3 machines instead of whatever you can do with microservices. What benefit do I get?

Are you proposing the government drones that we haven’t been seeing are spreading weaponized drone flu, or that they have a slowed production until the spring because they are planning something much bigger?

Pidgeons. Geese. I haven’t seen a raven, or owl, or most song birds.

It’s almost like… They aren’t real 👀

I sort of wonder what this does to his brain.

Like he’s antisocial/narcissistic knows his policies are unpopular, but still powers through because he gets what he wants anyway.

But the ego in his head has gotten be doing little shit that’s making him think: “I’m going to nuke this stadium when I get back to the office.”

Oh. Well I’m not gonna be out that long.

I hope.

Uhoh. It really depends on how well I do and it is not well so far.

That’s a good point, but humans are basically stupid animals.

You can predict them to do something unpredictable

Man quetiapine just made me panic and feel like I couldn’t breathe. Actually there are a shit ton of “sedating” medications that do that to me thinking about it.

Except of course benzos, but thanks to those being cross tolerant with z drugs, they really gotta pump those in me to work at all.

I’ve had a little success with clonodine.

I remember abilify completely shut off my ability to think. Still had emotions, just no reasoning.

People talk about Dating being this thing that’s easy to do. Yeah. Maybe if you had any choice over what was and wasn’t difficult.

Im thinking about walking into therapy tomorrow and just asking “do I have to work if I’m just gonna be miserable anyway?”

:)

And the kind of resistance they expect is still possible.

But you will never hear about it from a story. If you do, it’s probably false.